(Video) My Open Relationship: Feeling Safe

Feeling safe

Being real about relating: sharing openly about my relationship with David, the patterns, the pitfalls, the victories. We all want to feel safe. But do you actually know when you feel safe? And when there are many voices/characters in your head: who’s right? What’s true? #exploringdeeper #openrelationship #nonmonogamy #polyamory#shiftingshit #droppingstories #yesandmoreplease Please follow and like us:

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(Video) I don’t always like my open relationship. And why am I more afraid than my partner?

Open relationships

David and I have an open relationship. For us, that means we are choosing to be primary partners, like in any ‘normal’ relationship. Besides that, we give each other full freedom to openly explore intimacy with others. I’m one of those persons who doesn’t find this just easy. Sometimes I don’t like being in an open relationship at all, but admitting that to myself feels difficult. And how can it feel that I feel like having different boundaries about a certain thing at the same time? How to deal with the insecurity? And why do some people find open relating more difficult than others (and why is it often so that one partner feels more challenged than the other)? These are…

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Why I like Kink and BDSM

Why I like Kink

When I tell people I’m a fan of kink or BDSM, there are usually three possible responses. Many people have no idea what I’m talking about. Others wonder why someone on the path of personal growth would be interested in something abusive and violent as BDSM. And then there are some who understand and are happy to find someone who agrees. Thanks to Fifty Shades of Grey and the many erotic novels that followed in its wake, BDSM – or the SM part of it, has become more mainstream as a flavor in the bedroom. But the picture these stories sketch a very limited, and in my opinion unhealthy, picture of this erotic art form. So what is it that…

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Relating Beyond Paradigms #5: Different Ways in Which we Love Each Other (video)

What if you express your love to your partner(s), and they feel attacked or frustrated? We have different ways of expressing love to others, and without realizing this, your attempts to come closer might draw you further away from each other. David and I share about our processes of loving each other and getting to know each other’s love language.   Please follow and like us:

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(Video) Two Women Talking about (Open) Relating #1

Wilrieke & May

My dear friend May Rompas and I love to share with each other about our relationships. And as we do that anyway, we thought you might like to be a fly on the wall and listen to our conversations. Here’s the first talk we share, where we talk about what our relationships look like, and how we deal with feelings of insecurity and fear.   Please follow and like us:

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(Video) What are Safer Spaces, and Why are They Important?

A safer spaces is a consciously designed environment to practice life. It’s a laboratory where you can practice doing things and see what the effect is. It’s not a place to do things right. Workshops might leave you with a high, bit not change your life. Embodied imprints can. Choose your workshops, play parties and other safer spaces wisely. Please follow and like us:

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Learning About Intimacy, Impressions of a Coach #1

* These writings are based on impressions from different sessions and different people. Facts about people are changed for the sake of privacy. I share these writings to create awareness of loneliness and how many of us struggle with intimacy. You are not alone. * You came to me because you had been hurt for many years. Your heart was closed and you couldn’t feel. How would you be able to relate to women again? To be vulnerable and be naked, to have sex again? As a boy you walked through the door, not knowing what to expect. We talked. I shared about my life and how I had been hurt in the past too. You relaxed, knowing you are…

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Relating Beyond Paradigms #4: Is This Really Impossible?

Impossible Relationships

When I met David some months ago (with a month being a lifetime) and we decided to step into a relationship, some of my dear friends mirrored to me that he seemed amazing, but that the relationship between us could never work. Him being a nomad wanting the experience of fatherhood, living in a community south of the equator and traveling a large chunk of the year, and even if he wouldn’t, he would still be far away. I being a mum with three kids in a weekly co-parenting schedule with a job that is a mission directly from my heart, and that requires my presence when I’m not with my kids. And I felt it too. Each time my…

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On Trust and Trusting

On Trust and Trusting

The deepest layer of trust is not about knowing what will happen, how to get what you want, or even about understanding your desire. There’s no use in trying to get it, as trust isn’t about ‘getting it’. Trust is a feeling. A close connection to your inner world and intuition. A clear communication channel to what’s deep inside and beyond you. Trust is alignment to truth. The purpose of your life’s journey. Trust is breathing and opening up, even when you’re afraid or believe that this time it’s all wrong. Trust is letting go of how you think you should get to where you think you should be going. Because you don’t know. The path is in the unfolding…

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The Orgasm of Inspiration

Inspiration is like a long, gentle orgasm, moving through me as I create._

Can I be lusciously written? Can I consciously allow myself to tap into a divine source of inspiration, of wisdom flowing through me just by opening the faucet? Can I be that vessel, that portal, upon my own request? Or is this spring of information ever present? The internal wisdom of collective memory that we can all tune into? Or maybe we are tuned in, but forgot or switched ourselves of through our busy busy lives? There’s this magic feeling that comes over me every now and then. It tingles my skin, as the touch of a lover can do. The slightest suggestion of a caress, that makes my blood rush. It’s an urge to create. As the water reservoir…

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