(Video) My Open Relationship: Feeling Safe

Feeling safe

Being real about relating: sharing openly about my relationship with David, the patterns, the pitfalls, the victories. We all want to feel safe. But do you actually know when you feel safe? And when there are many voices/characters in your head: who’s right? What’s true? #exploringdeeper #openrelationship #nonmonogamy #polyamory#shiftingshit #droppingstories #yesandmoreplease Please follow and like us:

Continue reading

(Video) I don’t always like my open relationship. And why am I more afraid than my partner?

Open relationships

David and I have an open relationship. For us, that means we are choosing to be primary partners, like in any ‘normal’ relationship. Besides that, we give each other full freedom to openly explore intimacy with others. I’m one of those persons who doesn’t find this just easy. Sometimes I don’t like being in an open relationship at all, but admitting that to myself feels difficult. And how can it feel that I feel like having different boundaries about a certain thing at the same time? How to deal with the insecurity? And why do some people find open relating more difficult than others (and why is it often so that one partner feels more challenged than the other)? These are…

Continue reading

(Video) Two Women Talking about (Open) Relating #1

Wilrieke & May

My dear friend May Rompas and I love to share with each other about our relationships. And as we do that anyway, we thought you might like to be a fly on the wall and listen to our conversations. Here’s the first talk we share, where we talk about what our relationships look like, and how we deal with feelings of insecurity and fear.   Please follow and like us:

Continue reading

Bridging the Gap between Masculine and Feminine in Relationships

Bridging the Gap between Masculine and Feminine in Relationships

In Tantra, we often speak about the different poles called feminine and masculine. The feminine desires to be loved, to be held by a strong masculine. The feminine loves to be opened, ravished into bliss and wanted. The feminine also loves to feel safe. To feel filled, as there is always a certain emptiness inside that creates a desire to be filled up that can overtake anything else. The masculine desires freedom. To not be trapped, but to journey towards the horizon, guided by a sense of purpose in life. There’s a goal, a direction and not even love can or should take the masculine away from this. Everyone and anything that takes away the sense of freedom for the…

Continue reading

Relating Beyond Paradigms #4: Is This Really Impossible?

Impossible Relationships

When I met David some months ago (with a month being a lifetime) and we decided to step into a relationship, some of my dear friends mirrored to me that he seemed amazing, but that the relationship between us could never work. Him being a nomad wanting the experience of fatherhood, living in a community south of the equator and traveling a large chunk of the year, and even if he wouldn’t, he would still be far away. I being a mum with three kids in a weekly co-parenting schedule with a job that is a mission directly from my heart, and that requires my presence when I’m not with my kids. And I felt it too. Each time my…

Continue reading

Relating Beyond Paradigms #3: Dealing with Triggers (video)

What do you need love?

When relating is a way of growth, a conscious choice to explore deeper, triggers are bound to come and everything you tried to escape will come up… My days of dealing with intense emotions and fear, learning to express desires and boundaries. Do you want to explore deeper into your personal process of creativity, intimacy, love, and relationships? Book an (online or offline) individual session with me – also for business inspiration and finding where you feel stuck, and how to move beyond that. Sign up for my newsletter to be the first to know about new projects and read unpublished material, and check my calendar for upcoming events in Europe! Please follow and like us:

Continue reading

Relating Beyond Paradigms #2: The Meaning of Courage (video)

Relating Beyond Paradigms - Courage

About the courage of relating beyond paradigms, as David and I say goodbye for a month. We are sharing some of the tools we are using for creating this relationship. Do you want to explore deeper into your personal process of creativity, intimacy, love, and relationships? Book an (online or offline) individual session with me – also for business inspiration and finding where you feel stuck, and how to move beyond that. Sign up for my newsletter to be the first to know about new projects and read unpublished material, and check my calendar for upcoming events in Europe! Please follow and like us:

Continue reading

Relating Beyond Paradigms #1: New Beginnings

Tribe within a Tribe

Your eyes find someone you like on Facebook, Tinder or, in an old-fashioned way, in a bar or a birthday from a common friend. A reaction in your body. What would it be like with this person? Would they like me? You start a conversation, ask about each other’s lives, occupations, and favorite music. When the answers feel good, you might talk more. Relax a little, exchange a smile. You might start moving in closer. Touching. Maybe you end up in one of your houses for a night of exploration, or maybe you take it slower. Getting to know each other better before sex happens. You move into a relationship. Gradually you get to know each other’s hopes, dreams, and…

Continue reading

Magic is Real and We Can Create it All the Time

We can create magic

Our imagination is so limited by the cage of conditioning. We all create beliefs about how we should live, relate, behave, work, parent or look – beyond what we realize. We limit our magic with our own thoughts. And our thoughts are the key to freedom as well. Our thoughts that are created by our belief systems and our emotions. But are they real? Is there anything we cannot create? What if we are powerful beyond imagination and indeed, capable to create magic? Magic is in big things and in small things. It exists, but only when we believe. I spent the last days in Paris, with my beloved. A relationship that from just the mind is pretty challenging to make…

Continue reading

How Deep can You go Before Breakfast?

How deep can you go before breakfast?

Spending some beautiful days in Copenhagen with my beloved. Coincidentally we appeared to have planned time in the same city, already before we met. A rare thing in a fresh, long-distance relationship. Spending days together feels precious. There are many more days where we don’t see each other, have at least a country between us. So I want to not take it for granted. Appreciate the time and savor it. Once I made the choice to live true to my heart. Follow my passion. More recently I made the choice to share my truth, even if means facing the fear of chasing someone away. This morning fear and sadness came up. My oldest and deepest wounds were touched while waking up in…

Continue reading

  • Have your best holiday EVER!

    Everyday Tantra Amsterdam